These were written in 1968 by Kent M. Keith, but I’d never heard or seen them until recently. One of the performances at Harding’s Spring Sing this year was a rendition of Martina McBride’s “Do It Anyway”. I thought the lyrics were really cool, so I Googled them and found Keith’s website.

The Paradoxical Commandments
by Dr. Kent M. Keith

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.

Well, Donald Trump just verbally murdered you. How do you like them apples?

Jim Rome is running a block of Trump quotes on Rosie spliced together into 2 minutes of continuous beatdown. Here’s the back story, and here’s the beatdown. (clicky-clicky for audio goodness)

David Beckham, “the world’s biggest sports star”, is coming to the U.S. to play for Major League Soccer’s Los Angeles Something-or-Other. No, I don’t know who he is either.

To whomever sent the unsigned letter to my house yesterday:

If your intent was to hurt, you succeeded. If your intent was to help, you have a grave misunderstanding of the issue and the proper means by which to confront somebody.

Since you are obviously a fan of quoting scripture, let me share one with you:

“If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.”
-Matthew 18: 15-17 (NIV)

I’m far from an expert on the matter, but I’m almost positive that when Jesus said “go and show him his fault, just between the two of you” that he did not mean “send an anonymous letter, eliminating the possibility of explanation or discussion.” I’m not sure how that is supposed to win someone over.

I do know that it was hurtful and unfounded, and if you have any backbone whatsoever you will confront the person you’re trying to correct rather than fire off arrows under the protection of anonymity.

Needham High School (Massachusetts) has decided to stop publishing the names of kids who make the honor roll in the local paper. The change was proposed by one of the namby-pamby parents (probably a Red Sox fan) who lived with the daily horror of having only one of his three kids on the honor roll.

Great idea, dad! Let’s spend our energy removing recognition from those that earn it rather than motivating the others to succeed. Viva mediocrity!

I have a better idea. Instead of removing the honor roll, lets start publishing the list of employees at the local McDonalds. Then in a few years all of your kids will have had their names in the paper.

Anna the Elf
Abby the Elf

Mad props to Karla for finding this!

this 10-speed bike:

Props to Karla for finding this.

this fat baby:

Also, my BMI has dropped a point and a half during my quest for emaciation.  I’m going to go knock back a couple shots of ranch dressing to celebrate.

this Eureka vacuum: